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Thursday, 11 February 2010 10:17 | Written by BartMan
"One more sleep to go, one more sleep to go, one more sleep to go"...  Mrs BartMan was wondering what the hell I was on about this morning as we drove home from the gym.  Then my, "in the blue corner, from Auckland, weighing in at 1500 kilos, the Blues, and in the yellow corner, from Wellington, weighing in at 1600 kilos (that's the Tialata factor), the Hurricanes", gave it away.  Her eyes rolled into the back of her head about halfway through my spiel, I think she missed the end of it, but yes folks, Super 14 is back baby!

Am I excited?  Damn straight.  And no snipes at the Super 14 like some retarded journos.  The Super 14 is sharp as it is.  Sure crowds come and go, thjey always have, and they always will - look at the NPC.  Simple solution, drop the bloody prices so you don't have to mortgage the family pets to take the Mrs and the three snot-gobblers.  But that is neither here nor there.  Rugby is starting, you bloody beauty!

I do agree with Ratpoo though, the Crusaders look to me also the clear cut favourites.  An All Black laden forward pack, and a backline, that in typical Crusaders fashion, oozes good tradesmen, a few with special sparks to do something special.  Basically a backline that nine times out of ten will do the right tihgn at the right time - and that wins trophies.  That, and the fact last season, sans Dan Carter, they made the semi finals after being written off by all 'n' sundry.  The Crusaders have a history and an inbuilt belief that they can win, at all times.  Oh, and did I mention, Richie McCaw too...

As per usual, the first few rounds will be the sorting.  We wait to see if last seasons crap teams have bought well and matured, or if last seasons top teams are keeping up the good work, or resting on their laurels and starting that long slippery bobsleigh ride to the bottom of the Super 14 heap.  Exciting times, and makes watching pretty much all the games, even the ones not involving the Kiwi sides, worthwhile.

Early predictions, which might be worth heading, or more likely, ignoring (beware the curse of Bart) are hard to nail down, but I'll give it a crack.  Based on nothing but gut feeling, reading the TSF forum, and a few news websites...

I'll split the table into three - the top four, the next five, and then the five shit kickers.  My crystal ball and herniated gut tells me this...
Top Four.  Crusaders, Bulls, Hurricanes, Waratahs. 
The next Five:  Chiefs, Highlanders, Brumbies, Sharks, Reds.
The shit kickers:  Lions, Cheetahs, Blues, Force, Stormers.
Not in order though, and there will be sod all points between the top 6, and in fact from 5 to 10 or 11 will also be just a win and a bonus point difference.

The New Zealand team will perform as follows.

The Highlanders will reverse some of their close losses from the last two seasons, and will be pushing strongly for the top four - they would be my surprise package for the season.

The Chiefs will go back to normal Chiefs mode.  Crap, before a mid season revival, before falling at the last hurdle.

The Crusaders will crush all before them, perhaps having a hiccup against the Cheetahs or some other cellar dweller team when Blackadder plays his coaching staff after losing a bet.

The Blues will sometimes field 15 fit players, but not often - too many injuries will leave them wallowing mid to low table.

The Hurricanes.  Despite having powder puff props, the Hurricanes forwards will do enough to feed the backline ball of good enough quality to win matches.  They'll threaten, but as per usual, will fall at the final hurdle, which will be the Crusaders in a semi of a final.  I hope a final.  And I hope it is not bloody foggy, I would like to see a game this time around!!

Overseas teams, the Waratahs will carry on boring teams into submission, and the Bulls will carry on being bully boys, both winning enough to threaten the top four.

The Brumbies will go close to the top four to I reckon, but someone had to miss out for predictions sake.  Reds will have their best season since 1995, and the Force will have their worst since starting Super 14.

The remaining Saffa teams, the Sharks and the Stormers will be the best of the bunch, knocking over some quality sides, but also losing to some sides that they should demolish.  The Lions and the Cheetahs, they will continue to be the strongest teams in the league, as they will be at the bottom of the table, holding up the other 12 teams above them!

So there you go, get into it, it's about to start, the final Super 14, enjoy!

 

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